17 Comments

Damn this is good!!! I’ve said, “as a mother” too many times to count, as I spoke those word, I totally felt that it would give what comes after more weight. 😩 ugh, no more. Thank you for giving me a new perspective. I kinda knew deep down inside something didn’t feel right when I used that phrase. And you’re totally spot on about “as a father of daughters”

Thank you for such an enlightening essay.

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👏👏👏

Leena Norms recommended this essay and I am not disappointed. I feel your meaning with my whole being. From someone who got their tubes tied over the summer (while completely fertile, at age 27) and has been dealing with other people's emotional fallout since, thank you.

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As a non-parent who loves some kids that are not mine (obviously), I felt this in my bones. Thank you.

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This is spot-on — thank you for writing it!

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agreed!! Im a mum and always get the ik when I hear parents says that

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Yes! I detest it too.

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❤️

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Thank you so much for writing this xx

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This is an amazing short essay! Very powerful indeed. I run a publication on Medium called Life Without Children (Life Without Children is also on Substack as a second home, but not behind a paywall and not with all it's content). Medium allow writers to publish content there that has already been published on Substack, and it can be monetized. I would love to invite you to write for Life Without Children. If you don't know how Medium works, happy to talk this through.

https://lifewithoutchildren.com/

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OMG Yes!!!!!! THANK YOU for saying this

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This is so good I want to highlight every line 😮‍💨

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thank you for reading!

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Well said! As a non-mother I feel seen by this ❤️

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This just shows how little empathy most people have. Our system cultivates narcissism and this is the result.

We don't try to cultivate our ability to see others way of moving through the world. We also actively kick out the creatives who are born with a spatial giftedness that cultivates empathy.

This despite the fact our system's backbone runs on the free or extremely devalued labor of the empaths.

We should stop serving those that do not serve us.

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Some of the best caretakers I know are not mothers. Compassion is not synonymous with parenthood! (Still Born by Guadalupe Nettel explores this beautifully)

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yes I love that book!

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As a non parent I felt this deeply. Thank you for writing!!

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